Some characters show up all the time in
the novels of Discworld; others you may be
hard-pressed at times to find. Any way you
slice it, Discworld would be much more akin
to a drab, uninteresting sitting room without
this cast of heroes, villains, and assorted
So without any further ado, here's a taste
of some of Discworld's finest whom you may
run into from time to time. . . .
DEATH . . . An obvious sort of
fellow: tall, thin (skeletal, as a matter of
fact), and ALWAYS SPEAKS IN CAPITAL LETTERS.
Generally shows up when you're dead, or just
when he thinks you ought to be. Not a bad
chap when you get to know him (and sooner or
later, everyone gets to know him).
CARROT IRONFOUNDERSOON . . .
Captain of Ankh-Morpork's City Watch police
force. Bulging with muscles, this
six-foot-six-inch dwarf (he was adopted)
remains honest, good-natured, and honorable
despite the city's best efforts. Carrot may
also be the true heir to Ankh-Morpork's
throne (a subject filed under "I wouldn't ask
if I were you").
COMMANDER SAMUEL VIMES . . . Head
of Ankh-Morpork's City Watch, despite his
best efforts to the contrary. A slightly
tarnished walker along mean streets, and like
all good cops knows exactly when it's time to
be a bad cop.
CORPORAL C.W. ST. J. NOBBS . . .
Call him "Nobby"everyone else does.
Looking sufficiently like a monkey to have to
bear a written testimonial as to his actual
species, this City Watch member has a known
affinity for thieverynamely, anything
that isn't nailed down is his (and anything
that can be pried loose is not considered
nailed down). But honest about the big things
(i.e., the ones too heavy to lift).
ANGUA . . . Now a sergeant in
Ankh-Morpork's City Watch (which has a very
good affirmative-action policy; they'll take
anyone except vampires). She is a werewolf at
full moon, a vegetarian for the rest of the
month. Her ability to smell colors and rip
out a man's throat if she so chooses serve as
useful job skills, and have done wonders for
her arrest record if not for her social life.
A definite K-9 cop.
ESMERELDA "GRANNY" WEATHERWAX . . .
The greatest witch on all of Discworld, at
least in her opinion. Lives in the village of
Bad Ass in the kingdom of Lancre (the village
was named after a legendarily disobedient
donkey, since you ask). A bad witch by
inclination but a good witch by instinct,
Granny prefers to achieve by psychology,
trickery, and guile what others prefer to
achieve by simple spells. She's someone to
have on your side, because believe us, it's
better than the alternative. Owner of a
rather temperamental broom now made up
entirely of spare parts. Any questions?
GYTHA "NANNY" OGG . . . The
broad-minded, understanding, and
grandmotherly matriarch of a somewhat
extensive family, with fifteen children and
countless grandchildren. She's had many
husbands (and was married to three of them).
Very knowledgeable on matters of the heart
and associated organs. Likes a drink. Likes
another drink. Likes a third drink. Make that
a double, will you? She is the second member
of the coven, which has included:
MAGRAT GARLICK . . . Once a witch,
now the Queen of the kingdom of Lancre, this
young witch doesn't adhere to the "old
school" of witchcraft. She believes in
crystals and candles and being nice to
peoplebut she is a witch, so in a tight
corner will fight like a cat...
and AGNES NITT . . . and while
you're at it, why not meet Perdita as well? A
witch with a split personality, the rather
overweight Agnes Nitt walks the Discworld
while Perdita (the "thin" person said to be
within every fat one) whiles away her time
daydreaming and offering unwanted advice and
criticism. Gifted with an incredibly
beautiful singing voice capable of any pitch
or sound (comes in handy for belting out an
aria in perfect harmony with herself).
MUSTRUM RIDCULLY . . . The
Archchancellor of Unseen University. The
longest-standing head of the University,
Ridcully is notorious for his ironclad
decision-making, the incredible lapse of time
it takes to explain something to him, and his
all-purpose wizarding hat (suitable for
emergency shelter and the storage of
alcohol). Is now ever more terrifying since
he read a book on how to be a dynamic manager
in one minute.
RINCEWIND . . . Simply put, the
most inept wizard to ever exist in any
universe. Rincewind possesses a survival
instinct that far outweighs his spellcasting,
and is such a coward that (if Einstein is
right) he's coming back from the other
direction as a hero. Guaranteed to solve
every minor problem by turning it into a
THE LIBRARIAN. . . It's the primary
function of the Librarian of Unseen
University to keep people from using the
books, lest they wear out from all that
reading. It also happens to be a primate
function, given the fact that he's also a
300-lb. orangutan (transformed by a magic
spell, but he prefers it so much he refuses
to be re-transformed). Don't ever call him a
LORD HAVELOCK VETINARI . . . The
supreme ruler of Ankh-Morpork. A keen
believer in the principle of One Man, One
Vote; he is the Man, so he's got the vote.
Always in complete control of every situation
he finds himself in, Lord Vetinari's sense of
leadership and stability keep the city up and
running...and you'd better believe that this
is at the forefront of his mind at all
CUT-ME-OWN-THROAT DIBBLER . . . Not
really a criminal, more of an entrepreneur
who fits the needs of the times. Usually seen
selling some kind of food in a bun (no matter
how questionable its origins), C.M.O.T.
Dibbler is always on the lookout for
Discworld's latest business opportunity
(again, no matter how questionable its
origins). Not a man who asks questions, in
fact, and he would prefer if you would also
keep off ones like "what's in this
COHEN THE BARBARIAN . . . The
greatest hero in the history of Discworld.
He's an old man now, but hasn't let that stop
him. Don't laugh at him. In one of the most
dangerous professions in the world, he has
survived to be very, very old. Get the
THE LUGGAGE . . . Know it. Love it.
Fear it. Constructed of magical sapient
pearwood, the Luggage is a suitcase with lots
of little legs, completely faithful to its
owner, and completely homicidal to anyone it
perceives as a threat to said owner. Baggage
with a nasty overbite. Definitely not your
THE GREAT A'TUIN . . . The gigantic
space turtle upon which the entire Discworld
rests (with four elephants sandwiched in
between, of course). What is it really? How
did it get there? Where is it going?
(Actually, it is the only creature in the
universe that knows exactly where it is