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Discworld on $30 a Day

This is quite easy to do, provided you don't eat and like sleeping out of doors. There are about four continents on Discworld:*

Includes Ankh-Morpork, the Ramtops region, the witches' haven of Lancre, and the mysterious vampire-ridden domain of berwald, whose fragmentation into smaller states after the breakup of the Evil Empire is occupying a lot of politicians' minds (anything strike you as familiar?).

Home to the fruitful, multiplying, and extremely rich Agatean Empire. Has a certain "Far East" flavor, with a side order of Hot and Sour soup.

Not loosely based on Africa at all. Honestly.

A mysterious place to be certain, but some of its secrets have since spilled forth in the novel The Last Continent (by the way, "XXXX" is the manner in which it's written on the maps, since no one knew what it was supposed to be called). A vast dry red continent, where water is so scarce everyone has to drink beer. Still, no worries, eh?

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way."
— Terry Pratchett

Welcome to Ankh-Morpork, Discworld's most happening city and so carefully described it could be considered a character in its own right. Divided in two by the River Ankh—a waterway so thick with silt that it should really be considered a walkway instead,** Ankh-Morpork is one of those rather large cosmopolitan burgs that, like a lot of others with a similar claim to fame, always seems on the move but never really goes anywhere.

Some of the many watering holes you can frequent on Discworld, where revelers can go in as men, and come out still men but with fewer teeth:

The Mended Drum
Originally known as The Broken Drum ("you can't beat it") before the fire, The Mended Drum ("you can get beaten") is hailed as the most reputable disreputable tavern on Discworld, where the beer is, well, supposedly beer (more colorful metaphors may apply). It's also here that you'll find some of the best in live entertainment that Ankh-Morpork has to offer . . . if getting slammed over the head with something heavy or a single serving of knuckle sandwich is your idea of fun.

Other pubs of (dis)interest: The Bucket; Bunch of Grapes; Crimson Leech; Stab in the Back; King's Head; Quene's Head; Duke's Head; Troll's Head (perfect for those with a death wish because it's still attached to the troll).

Choose your path around Ankh-Morpork carefully, as you do not want to end up in the Shades. The oldest part of the city and about a ten-minute walk from Unseen University, the Shades is a yawning black pit with buildings and streets, an urban canker sore festering with criminal activity, immorality, and other similarly nasty habits. Every city has one. Need help? Don't expect any bleeding hearts around these parts, with the exception of your own. Multiple stab wounds can hurt.

Lord Vetinari's pleasure dome, complete with dungeons, scorpion pits, and other various forms of entertainment. The Palace Grounds are a must-see. Besides the obligatory bird garden, zoo, and racehorse stable, the Gardens, designed by the blissfully incompetent landscaper Bergholt Stuttley ("Bloody Stupid") Johnson, highlight a garden maze so minuscule that visitors lose their way looking for it, a trout lake 150 yards long and 1 inch wide (perfect for the dieting fish), and a chiming sundial best avoided at noon (it tends to explode).

Welcome to Discworld's most prestigious (i.e. only) school of higher learning and the heart of Ankh-Morpork. Think of it as a wizard's college and chief learning center of the occult on Discworld, dedicated to serious drinking and really big dinners.

The wizards don't so much use magic as not use it, but in a dynamic way (a bit like the atomic bomb) and the time not spent eating is mostly taken up by interdepartmental squabbles (which of course never happen in real universities).

Be sure to visit the Library, if the Librarian allows you in, that is (hint: bananas will get you everywhere). Once inside, gaze in wild wonder at its violation of physics with seemingly endless rows and shelves of tomes magical and otherwise—theoretically all of the books in existence, as well as those that were never written. Remember: no talking, no reading, no kidding.

School motto:
("Now you see it, now you don't.")

* According to Terry Pratchett in The Discworld Companion, "there have been other continents, which have sunk, blown up, or simply disappeared. This sort of thing happens all the time, even on the best-regulated planets."

** "They say that it is hard to drown in the Ankh, but easy to suffocate." —Terry Pratchett, The Discworld Companion